Ohh, you guys. I don't even know why I'm doing this. I've unsuccessfully tried blogging at least twice in my life, but I'm at it again. I mean, I'm probably doing it because I'm lonely, and I'm sad, and I'm happy, and I'm an "adult" now, I guess, and I don't really know how to be one of those. I'm just confused and overwhelmed and frustrated and I'm just full of anxiety. I've never dealt with anxiety and depression as badly as I have in the past three years. And let me tell you, it came out of fucking nowhere...and it's a hell of a problem to fix.
I guess I'm doing this because I've been very introspective lately and I need to put these thoughts somewhere before I explode. I can't keep my head straight because there's so much going on in it. I can't focus on anything. I can barely go in public because I'm so fucking nervous all the time. I remember when I used to love shopping, or going to the movies, or going to get drinks with friends...and now I can't do any of those things. I can barely leave my goddamn house anymore. It's crippling, and it's exhausting, and it's absolutely terrible, and it's ANXIETY.
There are people out there who've been dealing with these same problems their whole lives, and that's what makes me nervous. I feel so crazy, I don't know how the fuck people do this for years and years. I've been trying different doctors, and different medications, and hopefully soon I'll try therapy, but holy shit is this exhausting. Sometimes I feel like I don't even have the patience to keep trying different medications, but I can't get back to where I was before them, 'cause I won't make it, I swear.
So anyway, this is my blog about my daily battles with anxiety and depression, I guess.
Posted at 05:42 pm by YikesBikes1234